Slow Turning

Like the song says, you can learn to live with love or without it

Archive for the ‘Life’ Category

It Happened

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I had wanted to,

and almost did,

but there was always something

holding me back.

Until last night.

I said it.

I told him, “I love you.”

And it wasn’t scary or hard to do.

It actually felt good.

So I said it again.

And felt even better.


Written by rachel

November 16, 2015 at 11:12 pm

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Is It Love?

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He said, “I love you.”

I said…nothing.

What I wanted to say was, “how do you know?”

When I think of love, I think of everlasting. Forever.

But life has taught me, and Dwight Yoakam has sang, that “forever is a promise no love can survive.”

So, I don’t think about love. I think about who I want to be with, who makes me happy.

And that is you. And I’ll be with you until you don’t want to be with me any more.

Written by rachel

November 8, 2015 at 2:47 pm

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It wasn’t that long ago that
The thought of you brought
A flush to my cheeks and
Made my heart race.

Now the thought of you brings
Tears to my eyes and thoughts
Of unanswered texts and
Cancelled trips.

I know that when I was
With you, I was happy
But now I wonder if you
Ever felt the same.

Do our moments together
Mean less now that we’re
Not talking? Or can I still
Look back and smile?

What hurts the most isn’t
That we’re over, but that you
Just stopped wanting to see
Me and responding to me.

It took me awhile, but
Then I realized it wasn’t that
You were going through
A difficult time.

I was just unwanted.

Written by rachel

April 9, 2015 at 6:29 pm

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In the End

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I miss you.

I miss the way I felt when we were together.

What hurts now, is that our beginning is going to be left without an ending. The hardest part is not that we came to an end, but that we ended because you just pulled away.

Without a word.

I never got the chance to tell you that you broke my heart.

And that I still miss you.

And will be waiting for you, if you ever change your mind.


Written by rachel

March 29, 2015 at 6:17 pm

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What They’re Saying

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I watched the Oscars this year because Neil Patrick Harris was hosting. I didn’t see any of the movies nominated so I didn’t care one way or another who won. I wanted to be entertained, but I ended up being moved.

It’s 2015 and there is still a need for people to speak out for equality and acceptance. In what is supposed to be the leader of the free world, we are still struggling with these issues. We are not focused on solving problems like climate change and education; we are fighting for marriage equality and voter rights. Thankfully there are people who are willing to speak up, like these people did tonight.

Patricia Arquette: Best Supporting Actress, Boyhood

John Legend & Common: Performance, Glory

John Legend & Common: Best Original Song, Glory

Graham Moore: Best Adapted Screenplay, The Imitation Game

Written by rachel

February 22, 2015 at 11:29 pm

Maybe Next Time

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One cop

One kid

One gun

One life lost


No indictment

No trial

No justice

No closure


Without due process we’re left with the questions of “why?” and “what if?”

The only answers we get are rumors and accusations

Maybe next time we will find the peace we’ve been lacking


Written by rachel

November 30, 2014 at 7:04 pm

Posted in Life

Chasing Love

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I’m not sure if I am impressed with the people who search for love in every face they meet, or if I feel sorry for them.

To believe in something so much and never give up is impressive. But is love so simple that it’s just a matter of looking hard enough for it? Do you have to see what love isn’t before you know what love is?

Maybe it’s the search for love that people fall in love with. They become addicted to the chases, the thrill of meeting someone new and anticipating the what-ifs. They crave the transformation of monotonous moments into exciting new experiences.

I wonder, though, if the chase ever starts to feel like a burden. To keep looking for love, all the while trying to force it with another new person.

And what happens to your heart every time you try to share its love with someone who isn’t “the one”? Does it make you better able to identify love or do you become numb to the process as a way to shield yourself from heartbreak?

What happens to love when you call something less than love, love?

Written by rachel

October 11, 2014 at 10:50 pm

Posted in Life, Ponderings

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