Slow Turning

Like the song says, you can learn to live with love or without it

Day 13: Lost & Found

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Playlist: BS Report Bill Simmons & Jacko talk about the Yankees collapse

Last night I was doing random searches online.  (I almost typed, “on the internet” but then I caught myself and remembered that it was not 1999.)

I typed in my dad’s full name and one of the results was a link to for his mother.  That one link gave me more information about my dad’s family than I’ve had since I was 10, which was the last time I saw them.

Long story short, my dad was raised in the Mormon church, but left it when he turned 18.  He married my mom, a Catholic, and then adopted two Asian kids (me & my brother).  For as much as they cut him out of the family, I’m surprised they still saw and spoke him after all that.  After the divorce, whenever we’d visit his parents we’d always end up sleeping outside in his van.  I do not have good memories of his parents but I would like to meet his brothers.  He also has two sisters, but they made no attempt (that I know of) to see my dad while he had cancer and neither made an attempt to see me or my brother after he passed.  His brothers are both younger.  The older of the two I’ve never met. The youngest brother is about 7 years older than me and I have a few memories of him.

What I learned is that I my dad’s mother passed away in 2008 and his brother in law passed away a few years before her.  His family is spread between Colorado, Utah, and Montana.  I think I’ve found his oldest sister’s son and his youngest brother’s wife on Facebook.  His sister’s son may actually be her stepson.  I’m not sure, but I believe her husband was quite a bit older than her and already had children when they married.  I’m honestly not sure if my dad’s youngest brother would even remember me.  There’s a part of me that would like to reach out but I’m not sure what I would say. “Hi, I’m the niece you’ve never tried to contact but I wanted to say hello.”

I think I’ll tell my brother what I found.  I’m not sure I’ll tell my mom.

Busan, South Korea

This is the first picture I’ve seen of the place I was born in.  Thank you Adam Levine for the pic tweet!

Nelly’s Echo

I was really moved by Nelly’s Echo when he auditioned on The Voice:


When I was in high school, this is what I wrote in everyone’s yearbook:

Smile through it all and you’ll have happy memories.

It still rings true for me, but I don’t think it’s enough anymore.  I think I need to find, and do, something I love.  I just honestly don’t know how.  I love watching sports, political commentary, and listening to music.  I don’t know how to turn that into gainful employment.  I guess that’s the challenge.


Written by rachel

September 12, 2012 at 9:29 pm

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